Throwing Mud at the Wall

See What Sticks.

This was a phrase I used a lot with cooperating teachers while I was teaching.  We used it to describe behavior management techniques, comprehension strategies, even seating arrangements.  Today I used this phrase to describe what has become a daily (often twice daily) battle of wills at bedtime when my children are supposed to be going to sleep.  I feel like we have been fighting this battle for years, and when I think back, Avery was probably the same age Connor is or younger when these battles started, so I think I really HAVE been doing this for years.  My children refuse to go to sleep at night.  Little terrors will stay in their rooms just long enough to make Michael and I go to bed, and then, once we're comfy and cozy, they'll sneak out and play until all hours of the night.  Often we hear them, sometimes we go back and scold them and redirect them back to bed, occasionally we just ignore it and hope they don't destroy too much.  (So I guess we get what's coming to us when they really do...)  Their favorite activity is pulling the drain up in their bathroom sink, filling the sink with water, squeezing new tubes of toothpaste into the watery mess, pumping hand soap into the brew, sometimes conditioner is handy and they throw that in for good measure, then they use their solution to either brush their teeth, clean their toys, wet washcloths, hand towels, or regular towels (for costumes, of course), or simply to drip and splash all over the bathroom.  Needless to say, this has happened several times and Mommy isn't ever very happy about it.  But that's not the point of this post.  We are still trying to find the best method of keeping our kids in their beds at night.  The last week or so I have taken to sitting on the floor in Avery's room telling her to close her eyes every time she peeks until she finally falls asleep.  Without Avery leading the charge, Connor goes to sleep rather quickly in his own room.  This worked for a while, but Avery has gotten good at looking and activity like she's asleep so I leave, and soon she and Connor are playing again.  Often, when I leave assuming she's asleep, I believe Connor has already fallen asleep, but when she sees the cost is clear, I think she goes to his room and wakes him up to play with her.  They play more cooperatively together after 9pm than any other time of day.  Before we've tried locking them in their rooms (so we can get in but they can't get out), threats, bribery, routines, nothing seems to work.  So today I'm trying something new, another form of bribery, but tweaked a little.  I did something like this during their nap times when they were little, but tonight I decided to pull it out of my bag, dust it off, and give it another shot.  I put 5 m&m's in two bowls.  A pink bowl for Avery, a green bowl for Connor.  And I told them I was setting a timer for 30 minutes.  I warned them that every time they even opened their bedroom doors, I would eat one of their pieces of candy.  My hope is that in the 30 minutes of quiet, they'll fall asleep without getting a sugar rush right before bed.  ;)  Of course, I'm good for my word.  If they stay in, I'll take their candy into their rooms, even if they're asleep.  And if they're not, they'll still get the candy, because they earned it, and tomorrow night we'll try 35 minutes (although we won't technically be here tomorrow, so Monday night).  Right now they have 10 minutes left.  I haven't heard Avery in a while but Connor is still talking to himself.  Neither of them has stepped foot out of his or her room.  I'm pretty impressed!  Here's hoping that with this quiet time, even if they aren't totally asleep, they'll fall asleep quickly after their reward.  Wish me luck!  How much could 5 little m&m's hurt, right???  ;)  Night all!